Monthly Archives: June 2015

True Colors Part I

(with Spanish subtitles – lyrics are below)

You with the sad eyes
Don’t be discouraged
Oh I realize
Its hard to take courage
In a world full of people
You can lose sight of it all
And the darkness oh inside you
Make you feel so small

But I see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that’s why I love you
So don’t be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful
Like a rainbow

Show me a smile then
Don’t be unhappy, can’t remember
When I last saw you laughing
If this world makes you crazy
And you’ve taken all you can bear
You call me up
Because you know I’ll be there

And I’ll see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that’s why I love you
So don’t be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful
Like a rainbow

If this world makes you crazy
And you’ve taken all you can bear
You call me up
Because you know I’ll be there

And I’ll see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that’s why I love you
So don’t be afraid to let them show

Your true colors
True colors
True colors
Shining through

I see your true colors
And that’s why I love you
So don’t be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful
Like a rainbow

Songwriters
STEINBERG, BILLY / KELLY, TOM

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♪♫Good morning, Star Shine

♪♫the K says hello …

Hope you are all doing well. I haven’t written in a while, so I thought I’d say ♪♫hello! Life is hard lately. I started doing the food/fitness thing, went to a nutritionist and she said 1100 kcal and see you in 4-6 weeks! Yeah right. Has she not heard that there is such a thing as low metabolism when you starve someone? ♪♫hello!! “Ok, enough of the hellos already,” I can hear you from here! O-tay!

Anyway – it is tough. The diet/fitness. The anxiety! The sexual abuse maybe/maybe not thing. The depression-bipolar-anxiety thing. Yes I said anxiety already. Sigh-YUH! (and again).

So, I am not writing, and I don’t know if the not writing is helping or not. I do plan to do Nano Camp in July.

So, yeah. I’ve wanted to blog. And I miss you guys. I also had to stop most of my blogging friend notifications, so I am depending upon the Reader when I read. It is not the same as an email saying so-and-so posted. Definitely not. Did I tell you I miss you? But I was getting to be a worse mess than I am, and something had to go, call it a diagnostic test, in a way.

The meds are out of whack, I am pretty sure. I’m thinking about a second opinion. I’ve had a number of adjustments, and it is just not working. I am not hospital or partial-hospital bad, but almost.

I am also having difficulty regarding some of my ministries at church. One of them was bringing some people to choir practice and/or early to church. High maintenance people, emotionally, and I am the sponge. That had to go, even though it doesn’t “make sense,” after all, I’m going that way, right? Well, tough! It is hurting me and my sanity! Did I tell you how impossibly hard it is for me to say no? But I have to. I am going insane. That’s just one “minor” thing.

Did I tell you what is right? God goes with me wherever I go, whether I feel Him with me or not, see Psalm 139. Also, I have not drank or drugged or done anything self-destructive, except for talking to myself not-nicely, and I am working on that. Also, and this is not minor at all, I have some a-may-zing friends IRL (in real life)! It is so, so important in this mental health and spiritual journey. Get some!

What else. Did I tell you I miss you, and “here”? I miss writing, and sorting things out in my mind, and reading some of your blogs, and just hanging out. I may have to rethink this. But not today. Today, I am just “here.” That’s enough!

Well, I will just leave this at “that,” I’ve got things to do and people to see (a nice one. She helps). Ta, ta, and all that. LOVE AND PRAYERS for any of you reading this. xo and ttyl!

My Dear Fellow Bloggers and Bloggettes

I am going to take a wee break from blogging for a while and get some things sorted out, I PROMISE this is not a suicide note by any stretch. I will be back by when I can but I really need a break for a bit. I do have a few of your email addys and I am sure I will be posting once in a while when I can. Just have some personal work I need to do (I’m sure y’all know about THAT lol)

xoxo

Jesus, please pray for us to the Father!

For those who believe

I have been thinking a lot of the fact that Jesus prays for us, not prayed. I often think of where Jesus said He prayed for Peter: Luke 22:32: But I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren

So, I am offering up a prayer, for those who believe, that Jesus pray to the Father, that our faith fail not! And you see also that as He restores us, He expects us to strengthen each other. There are many forms that that can take, and I am mindful of prayer, but also of more concrete things as well. Something to think about. And, Jesus prayed for all of us, including the world, in other spots in the Bible. What are your thoughts?

Isaiah 53:12
Therefore will I divide him a portion with the great, and he shall divide the spoil with the strong; because he hath poured out his soul unto death: and he was numbered with the transgressors ; and he bare the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors.

Romans 8:34
Who is he that condemneth ? It is Christ that died , yea rather , that is risen again , who is even at the right hand of God, who also maketh intercession for us.

John 17:
20 Neither pray I for these alone, but for them also which shall believe on me through their word;
21 That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us: that the world may believe that thou hast sent me.
22 And the glory which thou gavest me I have given them; that they may be one, even as we are one:
23 I in them, and thou in me, that they may be made perfect in one; and that the world may know that thou hast sent me, and hast loved them, as thou hast loved me.
24 Father, I will that they also, whom thou hast given me, be with me where I am ; that they may behold my glory, which thou hast given me: for thou lovedst me before the foundation of the world.
25 O righteous Father, the world hath not known thee: but I have known thee, and these have known that thou hast sent me.
26 And I have declared unto them thy name, and will declare it: that the love wherewith thou hast loved me may be in them, and I in them.

Crowdfunding – For Everyone?

Ever heard of GoFundMe? It’s probably the most well-known means of raising funds today, via Crowdfunding. They’re everywhere!

Crowdfunding is a means of enlisting, organizing, and gathering donations – to help a family replace a burned down house, say, or to help Fido get a new leg, maybe enable Suzy Sidewinder to publish her first book, or even help poor Cloe Bodacious pay her Uber bill – what?

In my case, it was to help a friend and her husband avoid homelessness. I was able to raise a small amount to help them relocate and re-establish themselves until her social security came through (and didn’t we all breathe a sigh of relief when it did!).

Here’s how it works:

According to GoFundMe, “In 2008 Brad Damphousse wanted to save up for a vacation. Frustrated that savings accounts were so difficult to open online, he decided that a web-based ‘social’ savings account – one that allowed others to make deposits – would be more fun. That idea sparked the journey that would eventually result in one of the world’s most successful crowdfunding platforms.”

Here it is 2015 and GoFundMe has raised a purported 1.1 Billion dollars for people in need. It’s a great opportunity! But what has happened to selling cookies and candy bars, working overtime, and having fellow employees hand over their earned sick time?

And are the great gobs of cash that are raised appropriate? Has it changed our idea of being self-sufficient by becoming our first option for fundraising?

There are at least three “GoFundMe” type advertisements in my Facebook feed almost every day, and they are not always generated by my friends list. GoFundMe is even sending me email to advertise how much this charity or that person has raised through their service. Do they want me to go again?

It’s also not always appropriate. According to Caroline Moss of the Business Insider, one woman who drank too much and ran up an obnoxious Uber cab fare decided to crowdfund to help herself pay her rent. Kinda not the way it was intended, lady. I really think that there can be too much of a good thing. My friend desperately needed the help and there was none forthcoming. A friend’s daughter with cerebral palsy needed a bathing system in order to live independently. and they could not fund it on their own. These are clear cut cases of need.

Is that the case with everyone who uses GoFundMe? I just have to wonder. I’m finding personally that this market is pretty saturated. I already get that feeling that “I gave at the office,” like everybody has their hand out. It’s an idea whose time had come, certainly, but perhaps there are harder, more personal, and more rewarding ways to raise money that could be tried, or at least considered, before crowdfunding.

Now where did I leave my cab fare?

I wish I could remember …

Now and then I get a few ideas in a row of topics for writing blog posts. In the past I’ve let my readers vote on which they would like me to write about. I suppose I could do that…

1. Valerie Weeks, my BFF who died when I was in 9th grade – on friendship

2. Dohhhhnuts… my battle with health and fitness. (hm, there are a lot of areas of “health” besides diet, right? Right?)

3. GoFundMe – the explosion of a trend

4. Losing my religion – or for that matter, – finding my religion. Being a religious snob – healing in the name of Jesus are bit ebenues (yes, that’s a typo but I will remember)

5. I forget what the other topics were. Durn it. But I will remember the important things to write about, people SAY.

6. Ask me something – relatively clean in nature, but if I can address it, I will