So for about a nanosecond my Cymbalta seemed to be working. But I can attribute the blahs to being sick with a cold or “whatever.” Don’t really have much to say except that hopefully I will have much to say when I feel bettah.
Unless you live under a rock, which is under a rock, which is under a rock, you heard about the false alarm that sent the entire population of Hawaii, their family members and friends, state and federal officials, and, I would imagine, the person who pressed the button – TWICE – into panic!
Remember playing “make betend” as a child? Can you do that with this scenario? What if it was you and your family that received that alarm via your own precious cell phone? What’s the first thing that would come to your mind to do?
I’d like to think I’d be working on my phone list trying to convince any and all of my family and friends to accept the Lord Jesus as their Lord and Saviour, now! That would be my last and dying wish and nothing else would matter to me!
So why don’t I do that now?
My family knows the Gospel, they know that it is my fervent belief, but not being faced with a crisis makes the coming of the Lord seem far away, if it is thought to be real at all. My son assured me it was a “not yet” – he has a lot of living to do first before he repents of his sin and changes his life – or consents to it being changed.
But what if that missile was headed for him? What would he do? Would he remember to seek the Lord? Would he even have time? What if there was no warning? as it is with most people, who simply die when it’s time – no warning, no planning. And certainly no time to reconsider. And certainly every death does not wait until someone is 70, or 80. Many people die “before their time.” But the Bible says it’s an appointment we must keep. From Hebrews 9:
27 And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment: 28 So Christ was once offered to bear the sins of many; and unto them that look for him shall he appear the second time without sin unto salvation.
Check out this video for a family’s point of view of the incident:
What would you do?
Well I am safely back home from the Jubilee! I drove myself up and back, 690 miles round trip, which is a really big deal for me. But I just felt like God really wanted me to go (and at the very least, I wanted to go).
It strikes me at these things that very soon someday we will be having a “pahty” much like the Jubilee. Holy music, holy people, holy scripture, and, most of all, our Holy King, King Jesus! It will be the norm to feel at home, rather than feeling like we’re the exception to every rule, the odd ball out. And the shouting from the pulpit will be “HALLELUJAH!” not admonition.
Because sometimes at these meetings things get loud. We are reminded where we’re falling short. There’s a little pounding on the dais for emphasis (okay, sometimes a LOT!)
Will there even BE a podium in Heaven?
I personally can’t wait for every day to be a meeting, a gathering of like-minded souls, smiles all around, instant friendship and understanding!
Yep, that’s what I like about these meetings! I was sad to leave. But now that I’m home I get to go to another meeting – a prayer meeting at my own home church — a gathering of like-minded souls, smiles all around, instant friendship and understanding!
Now to choose between a nap and a shower …. no time for both!
I was able at the last minute to go to the Emerald Coast Jubilee in Milton Florida, near Pensacola. It’s a close to 6 Hour drive, or at least the way I drove it, LOL. I left yesterday, about 8 AM, and arrived at 2:30. Had a little talk with God on the way up, and he revealed to me something that will make a big difference for me in my Christian walk. Lo and behold last night the preacher hit on much of what God had revealed to me. I love it when I ask God to show me something, and he does. Even though it’s not very pleasant (the information that I received about myself. Not pretty).But hallelujah that God has changed my heart, and is continuing to do so!
Cyberhymnal is a great site for finding lyrics to hymns, and the stories behind the songs. I find this stuff fascinating!
This morning in church we sang this hymn (youtube video at bottom of page). The hymn is based on Hebrews 9:28 So Christ was once offered to bear the sins of many; and unto them that look for him shall he appear the second time without sin unto salvation.
One day when Heaven was filled with His praises,
One day when sin was as black as could be,
Jesus came forth to be born of a virgin,
Dwelt among men, my Example is He!
Living, He loved me; dying, He saved me;
Buried, He carried my sins far away;
Rising, He justified freely forever;
One day He’s coming—O glorious day!
One day they led Him up Calvary’s mountain,
One day they nailed Him to die on the tree;
Suffering anguish, despised and rejected:
Bearing our sins, my Redeemer is He!
One day they left Him alone in the garden,
One day He rested, from suffering free;
Angels came down o’er His tomb to keep vigil;
Hope of the hopeless, my Savior is He!
One day the grave could conceal Him no longer,
One day the stone rolled away from the door;
Then He arose, over death He had conquered;
Now is ascended, my Lord evermore!
One day the trumpet will sound for His coming,
One day the skies with His glories will shine;
Wonderful day, my belovèd ones bringing;
Glorious Savior, this Jesus is mine!
Cyberhymnal attributes the song’s words to J. Wilbur Chapman. “Chapman gave two poems (including this one) to Charles H. Marsh (MIDI, score).around 1908. Marsh then wrote the tune, but there was disagreement over the copyright between two publishers. As a result, this song was not published until 1911.”
Here is a Youtube video of the song:
You know, I don’t know how to be friends with more than one friend at a time. Same as having more than one boyfriend at a time; they get jealous and they expect you to tell them the truth, which will inevitably hurt them.
But some people insist on being your friend anyway and (here is where I get vague) I just can’t deal with being liked that much. Why don’t you just make it like when I was in Junior High School and nobody liked me and I was imbisible. Yes I know I said that funny but it’s because that’s how childish I feel when these particular issues come up. Honestly, it was torture being imbisible, too, but what I go through now is not fun either. I really can’t say much about the people and the issues because then I will be talking not-nice about someone and I’m not allowed to be not-nice.
I just want to play by myself. I want to read my book and that’s all.
Boundaries? What’s that?
January 3. I was reading Proverbs 3 today (I aim to read the Proverb that corresponds to the day each day. For example, today being the 3rd, I read Proverbs 3).
I had only read the first two verses and became instantly discouraged:
“My son, forget not my law; but let thine heart keep my commandments: For length of days, and long life, and peace, shall they add to thee.”
It wasn’t the “forget not my law” that tripped me up. It was the length of days and long life that I objected to. I am all for the peace part of it, but not so much the other. I started to pray:
Lord, the days are long enough. Why would I want to add to them? And long life? I just want to come Home to you. [As someone with a long history of depression and suicidality, living longer just does not appeal to me]. I’m tired, I’m always messing up, and I just don’t feel like I am getting – or giving – much out of life. So this year, help me to want to prolong the days and live a long life, so that I will have more time to serve You. I know you have work for me to do, give me the courage to do it. Show me what to do, give me the oomph to do it!
I kept reading. There is so much richness in this chapter, I thought to myself. Verse 5 was very familiar to me:
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
I nodded. Yep, I get that. I’d mess up a lot less if I gave that verse a little more heed.
Then verse 6 popped up, and it was one of those “aha” moments, as in, “Aha, I’ve never seen that verse before.”
But you know I have. I just never noticed it before. This is one way that God speaks to me. He brings the text alive as I am reading, and I may have seen it a hundred times, but the hundred and first time, God nudges me to pay attention: “Hey, Kat. This here is for you. Sit with this for a while.” It said:
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
In all my ways? Do I do that? And what does that mean, “acknowledge”?
Websters 1828 Dictionary says it is “To own or notice with particular regard.” So do I do that in all of my ways? Do I own or notice God with particular regard in my:
- Family relationships
- Church activities
- Handling of money
- Care of myself physically
- Care of myself emotionally
- Care of myself spiritually
In what ways could I improve?
To me, to acknowledge God means that I don’t just forge ahead with my life. I must “bring God along” in all my ways (paths). And I must also acknowledge that He is the author and the giver of it all. Kinda like at Christmas when you would rip into a present, and Mom would make me stop and acknowledge the giver. I didn’t even realize there was a giver, half the time. I was just so eager to get, get, get!
The verse says that if I do acknowledge God in all my ways, He will direct my paths. It is like what we were learning tonight in the lesson at church about David. He would ask God: Should I go here? or maybe here? Should I do battle with this people, or should I not? We also see plenty of examples in David’s life where he would fail to ask direction, fail to acknowledge God, and fail in his life. It was that simple for him.
Shouldn’t it be that simple for me?